Saying Goodbye

The death of a loved one is one of the hardest things that we have to overcome in life. It doesn’t matter how many promises we make with god to change the situation, the fact remains the same, this person is no longer in your life. How do you say goodbye to someone who once played a vital role in your world? Do you say goodbye?

I, like many in my world have lost loved ones, and we’ve all mourned our losses in different ways. We’ve been filled with indescribable sadness, emotions of anger, only to be followed by the inevitable acceptance of the loss. Why do we mourn our loved ones with such sadness? Perhaps our view of death and how we mentally process a loss is incorrect.

I have a fear of funerals. Not because I fear dead bodies, but because of how people react to the passing of someone. I view funerals as the opportunity to say thank you. I refuse to let my last memory of a loved one to be one where they are lying in a casket surrounded by people mourning them. A person’s funeral is the last time we will see them, why don’t we take the opportunity to say thank you for the joy they brought to our world and focus on the positive memories? Why not say goodbye with a thank you as opposed to through sadness and tears?

Religion teaches us to have funerals for people after they die, however society teaches us to cry and weep for a loss. What if didn’t weep for the loss, but rather thanked the person for being in our lives? I am a firm believer that god has a plan for all of us. We may not understand it, but a reason does exist. Perhaps I am naïve and that’s my way of accepting the loss of a loved one, but I do believe that everything happens in your life for a reason. When you are finished doing all the good you can do in the world, god decides to bring you home.

This is not to say that I don’t believe in mourning someone’s death. I believe that we as humans need to mourn the loss of a loved one, because we will be left with a void in our lives. However, I don’t think we should allow this this emotion to consume us entirely. Being stagnant in an emotion of sadness prevents us from being grateful for the happiness they brought into our lives. I think it is important for our own emotional and mental health that we focus on saying goodbye with gratitude than with complete sadness. By doing this, we are able to accept the loss of a loved one and move forward in life with all of the great lessons they have taught us.

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