Sometimes I wish I could unlearn a lot of what I learned growing up. Okay if I am being completely honest, there may be some falsity in that statement, but I do wish I could change my environment, and the only way I know to do that is to ignore some of the teachings of my parents.
Growing up, my parents taught me to always help others and keep my ego in check. These teachings were reiterated to me while I completed my degree with a minor in religion studies. I spent many of my adolescent and adult years trying to implement these teachings, but the truth is, it’s exhausting! I often find myself being time poor and struggling to keep my own life balanced. I wish I could say “no” to people and take some time for myself, but I feel that would contradict what my parents and religion have taught me, selfless service.
I recently watched a movie, and in it, one of the secondary characters said that “Selfish People Live Longer” and I couldn’t help but think that she might be on to something. Sometimes, I wish I possessed the ability to express how I felt and thought without offending those around me. I find that I try to help people so much that I end up neglecting myself, and that it is my downfall. People have come to expect that I will help them, and if I don’t, I am perceived in a negative light.
Perhaps I have taken the teachings of my parents too literally and need to learn to be a bit more selfish. But, I don’t know how to do that without offending those that are close to me. I guess this is something that I will learn overtime, I’m not too sure.