Breathe. Pause. Take A Minute.

Breathe. Pause. Take a minute to regain your strength and understand your worth. I feel as though I’ve become a prisoner of my thoughts. It doesn’t matter how hard I try, I can’t pull myself free from the shackles that are my insecurities. I try to stay positive and focus on the present. But the more I try, the stronger the memories of my past become. I’m not trying to run away from my past, I appreciate my past and the lessons I’ve learned.  However, lately I’ve become fixated with the negative emotions associated to the events that have taken place in my life. I wish I could control how I feel about the current circumstances in my life – instead of projecting the negativity of the past on to the present.  

I feel as though I’m standing in quick sand. The harder I try to free myself, the faster I sink in. While I exude confidence, I feel like a black hole inside. I feel lost and at the height of vulnerability. I feel haunted by the thought that I’m not good enough. When I least expect it, a little seed of insecurity appears in my mind, and like a fungus spreads to taint all of my thoughts.

Perhaps my insecurities aren’t insecurities, but rather fears in disguise. I’m at a turning point in my life, and maybe I’m afraid of myself. Maybe the fear of the unknown scares me, and I’m unintentionally sabotaging my mind to think that I am inadequate, when deep down I know I possess the potential to be great.  Perhaps I need to just let go and see where life takes me. Perhaps I need to take my advice to myself literally. Breathe. Pause. Take a minute to regain my strength and see where life takes me. Embrace the new direction of my life with open arms.

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One thought on “Breathe. Pause. Take A Minute.

  1. It’s so HARD to free yourself from the shackles of your past. I know because I’m exactly the same way! Our experiences up until make us who we are, however they do not define the future that we will have. Fear of the unknown causes us to slip in the comfortable shoes of that past – making sure that our responses, while holding us back and even at times being inappropriate for the situation we are in, are what we are used to and reinforce the narrative that our own minds have created.

    The good news is that we can work hard to break the cycle. I always remind myself that while in my head there is a nasty beast attacking 13 year old me, reminding me that I can’t do anything etc., the reality is that is only a small part of me. It’s a tiny voice that I amplify and if I just take away the microphone, it is drowned out by all the other positive thoughts that truly reflect who I am today and the successes that I have made for myself.

    Remember as the foundation of everything you do….YOU ROCK!!

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